You're Never Actually Gone
by Mr. Double A
Summary: With a galaxy no longer at war there is only one remaining threat to Shepard's life. Time.Shepard and Garrus discuss the course of their journey from beginning to it's inevitable end. Time is the enemy of all life, some battle it sooner than others.
1. Questions & Memories

**Questions & Memories**

She drifted listlessly through the dark void; stars shimmering around her as she continued into the empty abyss. Her body ached from the traumatic events prior to her well deserved rest. With the damage she had received she probably wouldn't be fit for another tour of duty. She was destined to retire with the role of ferrying those who witnessed her uprising, death and rebirth. Much like their ship the Normandy's crew too found themselves most days drifting in out of sleep, eating and just enjoying each others company.

It had been a month since the war for the galaxy was won and active duty members aboard the Normandy had departed leaving the shuttle bay, engine room, command deck and crew quarters virtually lifeless making Shepard's fish take the most animated portion of the ship. Although she was relatively abandoned, each floor had at least one patron tending the duties keeping the ship afloat. The shuttle bay was a dark empty space. The armory and computer interfaces Shepard frequented were powered down, the ceiling and wall lighting sources were also cut leaving only allowing a few floor lights available for Cortez to repair the last remaining shuttle. On the engineering deck the bellowing hums of the radiators and drive core could be heard throughout the somber halls. The remains of Diana Allers were no longer present in the starboard cargo. All that lingered was the thank you note she left the Normandy's crew at the room's entrance. In the port cargo Javik spent the days in solitude putting his mind to rest. When he wasn't alone, he was assisted Liara with her many books she planned to publish about the protheans. As the last of his kind he was usually found caressing the memory shard of his ancestors; archiving the war with the reapers and finalizing the shard with the thoughts of the last prothean.

The command deck seemed to share the similar vibe as the rest of ship, however it was a little bit brighter. Unlike the completely pitched dark war room, the command deck was a shell of its former state. The computers that lined the walls were unmanned leaving it a reminder of the diligent crew that allowed the Normandy to succeed in her many travels. The galaxy map that provided the greatest source of light was also powered down, creating a large dark space in the center of the command deck. However the cockpit was very much alive with the chatter coming from Joker and EDI. Their laughter echoed down the empty bridge as they shared crude and eccentric jokes with one another disturbing the growing silence around them. No one to give them commands. No one to judge. Just time.

However things weren't as peaceful on all decks. On the crew's quarters things weren't so stagnant. A human and turian seated across from each other at a table trapped reminiscing about the good times that had gone.

"She was so delirious!" Garrus laughed. "I mean she was trapped in that security field for who knows how long even longer hadn't we come along when we did. I just remember thinking, there is no way this asari is Prothean expert."

There was a brief pause before Garrus continued. "I can't help but wonder how differently things would've played out if…"

"It really does get the mind going doesn't it? Playing every scenario and figuring out all the effects is staggering. Especially if applied to the line of work we've done." Shepard adjusted his seat before proceeding. "Let's for a moment think about how things could have been if we never rescued Liara."

Garrus stared at Shepard. His mandibles twitching at the intriguing thought. "Entertain me."

"Well, what was Liara's purpose?" Shepard quizzed.

"My memory is a little fuzzy, but if remember correctly she was a valuable asset sought after by Saren."

"And we didn't know exactly why she was so valued until she revealed that she could make sense of the Prothean beacon's message which ultimately led us to Ilos where we found the conduit." Shepard recalled. "And I think we know how the rest went."

"So you're saying if we hadn't rescued the how you humans say damsel in distress, we probably would've failed to stop Saren and Sovereign?" The turian didn't seem to be in disbelief at the thought.

"We probably would have spent our time investigating geth activity on Feros and Noveria without having any real clue as to what they were doing." Shepard lowered his head followed by a sigh. "Sovereign would've just taken its sweet time flying right in without a fight…"

The two seemed to fall into their own thoughts as to the possibility of what could've been. The silence grew as the subtle drip of water droplets could be heard hitting the sink's base. Along with the rhythmic sounds of the kitchen sink, the air vents seemed to kick in creating a low hum followed by a subtle noise of vibrating metal.

The sounds grew more prominent the longer the two sat quietly. However it wasn't long after the room's ambiance was interrupted by Garrus.

"Let's not forget the sex." He grunted.

Shepard looked up at the alien. "What?"

"The sex. There wouldn't be any." Garrus stating the obvious.

"Yeah…I guess not." Shepard found himself thinking once again. However it was short lived as Garrus advanced the conversation.

"So you and her…you two are officially bond mates?" Garrus asked.

"Wife really wouldn't be the appropriate word now would it?"

"Thought as much. I mean I've always known." Garrus laughed. "There's only so many times you can meld your mind with an asari before she has you knees on the floor worshiping the ground her blue feet walk on."

"I guess so." Shepard's response seemed faded.

Garrus utilizing his C-Sec training analyzed the man across from him. "Something bothering you Shepard?"

"Not really…Just thinking."

The turian persisted. "Well let's hear it."

Shepard looked up at Garrus with appreciation. "You sure you want to hear it? It's just pointless thoughts."

"I think society, no matter where you were would be pretty quiet if not primitive hadn't the people learned to share their thought with others."

"Alright." Shepard shook his head regretfully.

"Besides, what are turian best friends for? Following the first human spectre as he runs head first into a glorious hell storm of reaper destruction which could have ultimately ended our lives? No. It's to sit quietly and listen to the first human spectre's inner most thoughts." The scaly alien spoke with his usual sarcasm.

Garrus and Shepard shared in the laughter before they digressed to their former stoic complexions. Like the two figures in the mess hall, the room seemed to calm as well, allowing the human and turian to address the matter at hand.

"It's about Liara." Shepard admitted.

"Ah." The turian responded unsurprisingly. "And?"

"It wasn't til recently that I've been thinking about our relationship and how…brief it must feel for an asari."

"That's all?" Garrus laughed in relief. "Here I thought you were gonna tell me she's having your kid."

Shepard gave a small smile while Garrus regained his composure.

"Look Shepard. I know during the time we were fighting you hadn't had much time to think about what you were going to do with the rest of your life, but you can't allow fear of the unknown haunt you…You've been haunted enough" He spoke sincerely.

"Believe me, it doesn't keep me up at night Garrus." Shepard assured his worrisome friend. "But let's do some math here."

Garrus scratched the back of his head in dread. "How about we get a couple more drinks? Then we can do math."

"What's wrong Garrus? I'm sure those calibrations require some sort of arithmetic." Shepard joked.

"Alright funny man how bout we get back to what's important here?"Garrus offered.

"Okay Liara was born in twenty, seventy-seven. I was born seventy-seven years later making me thirty-two and Liara one-hundred and nine." Shepard calculated.

"Right." Garrus completed the math as Shepard continued.

"Granted the hundred years or so I have left, Liara would be around two-hundred years old when I die, leaving her with about eight-hundred left." He sighed.

"What's this really about Shepard? You obviously aren't worried about the actual relationship of an asari and human." Garrus inquired before continuing. "To which I remind you she will probably look the same when you become a dried out shell of your former self."

"It's the after I'm gone part that worries me." Shepard confessed.

"Ah yes. The eight-hundred years she's going to have to live without you." Garrus leaned back in his chair in sympathy. "What's she gonna do?"

"Exactly. Eight-hundred years alone. Or worse…" His voice died.

"Eight-hundred years with someone else." Garrus exhaled loudly. "I understand your concerns Shepard but I think there's nothing to worry about."

"Thanks Garrus." Shepard accepted. As one who is unremarkable when it comes to being self-aware, Shepard did think it was strange that he worried about the time Liara would be spending alone rather than looking forward to life he had with her. "Emotions just getting the better of me."

"And here I thought all humans were only soft on the outside." Garrus joked.

"You do see my reasons for worrying, right?" Shepard trying to confirm if Garrus meant what he said.

"Well damn Shepard, with your resume you probably put every male in every species to shame with the crazy things you've done." The turian laughed. "I'm sure she's not gonna find any one remotely close to who she's got now. I mean let's think about it, who in the next eight-hundred years is going be able to move the galaxy with compelling speeches and good looks? Wrex sure as hell isn't"

Once again the two laughed, as did the ship. The air vents roared on queue right as the men broke out into laughter. Garrus was the first to return from his enlightened state followed shortly after by Shepard.

"How'd we get here Shepard?" Garrus rested his interlocked hands on his abdomen.

Shepard's eyes met the floor searching for an answer. "I'm not sure."

Garrus noticed that was the best he was going to get from the human and progressed. "An N7 officer turned galaxy's first human spectre befriended a turian C-Sec officer who turned infamous mercenary all the while comforting a sweet innocent asari doctor turned notorious information broker. It's a shame that it took the mortal well-being of the galaxy to bring us together…"

"It wouldn't have been nearly as fun if the circumstances were different." Shepard joked.

This time it was only Shepard who laughed. Garrus sat quietly staring intently at the empty glass in front of him. It wasn't until the room's resonance had faded that Shepard realized he was alone. Following his realization was an awkward pause. However this brief stillness was interrupted by the turian.

"Did I mention I'm sleeping with our quarian engineer who happens to also be an Admiral?" Garrus spoke nonchalantly.

Once more the two found themselves humored by the turian's words.

"We're an odd bunch aren't we?" He asked the man who might as well have been his only true friend.

"Yes we are Vakarian, yes we are." Shepard smiled.

The commander eased his mind into pulling up the first moments he shared with the original crew three years ago. From the moment he saved Ashley's life, Garrus' introduction, to rescuing Tali from armed thugs, standing off with Wrex on Virmire to departing the planet without Kaiden. He could see them all clearly. But his many memories the cloudless ones were those shared with the asari he came to love. It was all there in perfect clarity; Liara trapped in the security field at the dig site, the awkward conversations in Chakwas spare room, commanding her to leave a burning Normandy, the relief to see her safe on Ilium, to even her accepting the role as the shadow broker. From the first mind melding experience to what they expected to be their last bonding, he loved Liara T'soni. He felt like he'd been connected to her his whole life although only having spent a year out of the three getting to know her.

With the loss of everything, it seemed the only thing left to hold onto was the love he had for Liara, his friends and the Normandy. To Shepard that's what he feared the most since the war ended. Not the fear of Liara bonding with somebody else, but the thought of losing her. He wasn't spending it at the center of reconstruction projects, giving inspirational speeches to those who lost hope or even serving the aliance, he was spending his time with those who mattered to him. To live the rest of his life with the ones who defied fate.


	2. Blue, Black, & Red

**Blue, Black, & Red **

The ascending dark blue curtain reveals two figures dressed in sapphire positioned on the stage parallel to one another, patiently awaiting their queue. Mimicking each other's movements flawlessly the twins glide gently from one side of the stage followed by a brief pause. Then once again in unison the two effortlessly move to the opposite end before repositioning themselves center stage with perfect symmetry. With their brief performance at an end the curtain floats down from above concealing the two bodies.

Her eyes remained shut as she tossed at the center of her bed restlessly, eventually rolling over to the left side where Shepard had been sleeping hours earlier. Lying on her anterior she pressed her face against the pillow, inhaling the scent that lingered from the human male. The aroma of their evening's events filled her nostrils; the feint fresh fragrance of shampoo was overpowered by the dried sweat that clung to the pillow case. Once exhaled of the smell the asari rested her head towards the window on the wall of her room. With the Normandy drifting through empty space, and without the usual mass effect fields clouding her view, Liara was free to admire the stars that gleamed from the empty void. The tiny dots that riddled the dark space seemed to spark that youthful sense of wonder she harbored as a child. Although having seen a great deal of galaxy on her travels with Shepard and having information on even more of it, she finally felt that with the war over she had time to distract herself with wandering the endless frontiers of space.

With majority of the ship temporarily powered down Liara's door had been left open to which she could hear the feint laughter of the human and turian from the mess hall. Liara had thought about leaving the two as they were but soon realized an unexplainable difficulty of returning to her sleeping state without Shepard and eventually decided that she would try to coax him into returning to the bedroom.

Completely naked, Liara gently wrapped herself in the blue blanket as she began to search for her clothes. Debating on her normal white suit lying at the foot of the bed or the little outfits in her dresser, she decided that it would be too troublesome to properly wear her suit and didn't want to pick something out of her wardrobe. But it wasn't long before the asari settled with the the N7 hoodie that Shepard left on the couch just below the window. As she approached the couch Liara's hand released the cover revealing her natural form. Vulnerable to the cool air, the asari pulled the black jacket over her blue skin only pulling the zipper up enough to cover her breasts. Before covering her head with the hood, she admired the trademark red detail that signified the individual's status as an N7 operative. To think about the adversity that Shepard endured to reach this status of prestige made her smile. To know that a man of such honor and integrity would find a place in his world for her was all the motivation she needed to comfort Shepard for the rest of his years. To allow him the much needed rest he so desperately longed for.

With nothing but Shepard's hoodie, Liara checked herself against the window's reflection to make sure she looked appealing enough to pull Shepard away from Garrus as she knew the two males could sometimes get too attached to their conversations. As she scanned herself, the asari couldn't help but notice the bottom of the black jacket just barely covered past her buttocks. Although she felt uncomfortable with the amount of leg exposure, Liara quickly shrugged off the insecurity and proceeded through the monitored filled room. It wasn't as though she was walking out into a room full of complete strangers after all. Before passing through the open door Liara could not help but over hearing the conversation discussed between the two in the mess hall.

"The eight-hundred years she's going to have to live without you…" Liara overheard the turian. It was obvious what they were discussing but curiosity over took the young asari as she continued to eavesdrop on Shepard and Garrus until nothing could be heard. Ceasing the opportunity Liara gathered her confidence and stepped out from the room. A few steps out she realized the two had continued which left Liara somewhat surprised. However this his had not discouraged the asari as she knew that she would be able to approach relatively unseen which worked to her advantage.

"I'm not sure I ever expected the two of you." Shepard confessed in disbelief.

"Well what was I suppose to do Shepard? The goddamn world was ending, and when you're dragged along by the galaxy's only hope for survival it's nearly impossible to flirt with the ladies." Garrus defended. "And besides Tali and I have been along for the ride just as long as T'soni has, so there was some tension brewing."

Shepard laughed. "I'm glad things are working for you two."

Garrus laughter was interrupted by an approaching figure from the corner of his eye. "Well speaking of T'soni."

The asari gracefully approached the two males; their awe inspired gazes only raised her confidence. The human and turian hypnotized by the elegant saunter of the asari sat silently as they admired the exposed legs of the exquisite alien. With each step she swayed her hips from one side to the other, her sapphire eyes lusted over Shepard as she made her way to the table. It was difficult not to be mesmerized by the obviously nude asari covered only by a red and black hooded sweat jacket. Regaining his composure Garrus greeted Liara in hopes to mask his astonishment.

"Ah T'soni, we were just talking about you." Garrus spoke hesitantly to the asari that stood before him.

Liara shifted her gaze from the human to turian. "Oh? What about?"

With mandibles twitching, Garrus struggled to find his words as the asari's fixed her stare to him. "We were just…Well you see…I, I mean Shepard…" Garrus looked to Shepard for assistance as he fumbled amongst his words. Shepard however didn't seem to have an answer as he was in bewildered by the turian's hesitation.

Liara fanned her eyes at the turian. "Garrus you wouldn't mind me cutting in and stealing Shepard from you, right?"

"Liara you don't have to ask for your bond mate." Garrus seemed to relax but was still tense.

"It would be rude if I hadn't asked. Besides, I know how important your conversations are." Liara reassured.

"Well T'soni you can. You can have your Shepard back." Garrus nodded to the human across from him. "He was getting bored of this ole' turian anyhow."

"If you didn't want to talk you could have just said so. Don't make me the bad guy." Shepard smiled.

"Trust me Shepard the last thing I'd do is make you out as some insensitive villain. Anyways I gotta go check on Tali. If I'm lucky she's still on the couch I left her on." Garrus yawned. "That quarian sure can drink."

Shepard stood up and met Garrus with a firm handshake to end their conversation and soon Garrus departed for the lounge. As he watched after the turian, Shepard's eyes met with the asari are who stared at him shyly. Smiling, the two embraced. Silent yet passionate the two locked lips briefly before separating.

With the small distance between each other Shepard found himself ogling at the exposed areas on the asari. Beginning with her legs his eyes traveled to her chest, where her blue skin was defined by the v-shape opening from the half zipped hoodie. He finally made his way once again to the sheepish expression on Liara's face.

"I hope you don't mind me borrowing it." Liara smiled playfully.

"Not at all. In fact I think it looks good on you, and I mean with just the hoodie." Shepard responded as he pulled her zipper a few inches higher. "However I don't advise you pulling this off in the presents of others…I thought you were gonna give Garrus a heart attack."

"Okay. I'll make sure this will be sight reserved for the great Commander Shepard." She promised with a kiss on the cheek.

"So did you do all this just to get me in bed with you?" Shepard joked slyly.

Without a word the asari took a couple steps away from him before extending her hand out to the man. Unable to withstand the asari's appeal, he surrendered. Shepard placed his hand on Liara's and was gently guided back into the den from which the asari came.


	3. Stars & The Future

**Stars & The Future**

With the top removed they flew; escaping the container in which they were kept the fireflies scattered themselves amongst the dark space. Some took to the skies, some dove towards the ground while others clung to whatever they could, each with their own designated positions, each with their own radiant glow. The woman who unsealed the jar placed it beside her as she found her place on the ground looking up at the many small lights that shined around her. Although lively in their release the tiny orbs remained relatively still, a few flickered as if to communicate with the rest.

The tiny hologram projector provided enough light for the human to cradle his asari but wasn't bright enough to ruin the romantic ambiance courtesy of the artificial stars.

"I love gazing at stars." Liara spoke softly. "Even if their just holograms."

"Really? Never would've guessed." Shepard responded. He too was distracted by the specks of light.

"What? Just because I have spent years of my life faced down in dirt does not mean I am ignorant to the beauty of the night sky." Liara added.

"I think the last time I observed stars that wasn't through a ship window was back on Mindoir. I remember whenever my parents had fallen asleep I would sneak out to the hillsides behind our home to watch them."Shepard found that the more he stared into the holograms the easier it was to reminisce about his past. "What about you?"

"Oh Goddess it was so long ago." She admitted. "Back when I was sixty. On Thessia, I went on a trip to one of the more naturally preserved portions of the planet. We had set up camp in one of the clearings in the forest we had spent all day exploring, and before going to sleep I had a chance to admire the stars. Most the time was spent fantasizing."

"Fantasizing?"

"As to which of the stars harbored prothean ruins." Liara muttered in embarrassment. It was only with the Normandy's crew that she shared her nerdy enthusiasm for the ancient beings, but only after did she realize how unattractive her interest appeared to the average person. But none the less she knew Shepard appreciated her authenticity.

"Of course." Shepard laughed.

"Well it's not like space travel was some sort of captivating mystery." Liara added her own laughter. But her laughter was soon replaced by her usual calmness.

Once their humor subsided the two returned to their silent states of tranquility with a mutual understanding that a moment of silence was. However it wasn't long before their conversation resumed.

"Before slavers hit Mindoir I never thought I would find myself here, amongst the stars. I truly believed myself to be destined to a life of agriculture."Shepard receded. "Kind of makes me glad things happened the way it did."

"Shepard you can't possibly mean that. I'm sure that you would've made the same decision of joining the alliance had the batarians not attacked."

"You're right, Liara. Sometimes I see them in my dreams, the moment right before the colony was hit. They vary, but are usually consistent with in regards to my parent's actions. The most common is my mom cooking while my dad stands beside her whispering sweet nothings in her ear. While I watched as ships descended from the sky."

"I don't know what to say Shepard." Liara had not experienced the situation of losing her family at a young age, but could sympathize with the pain correlated with the loss of a parent.

"What is there to say? It happened years ago. And if it happened any other way I never would have had the pleasure of making your acquaintance."

"That's sweet of you to say, Shepard. But you shouldn't ever forget the love your parents had for you." Liara tried her best to lift the man's spirits.

"I won't. Hell, I can't. They're the people who shaped me into the man I am today. Hope that doesn't sound too cliché." He spoke having not needed her words of comfort.

"It's not. And if it means anything, they would be proud of what their son has accomplished." Liara smiled. "They say children reflect their parent's greatest traits. And from what I can tell, your parents must have been strong, virtuous individuals."

"Thank you Liara…Y'know when we have time, we ought to find ourselves a nice secluded spot where we can star gaze. A place that's not distracted by light pollution or disrupted by ship engines." He offered the woman beside him.

"I'd like that." Liara weaved her legs with his as she pulled herself to his chest. "Just you and me."

Minutes turned to hours while the couple lay silently. Liara -who comfortably position against Shepard - left the conscious man to be bothered by his thoughts as she slept.

"Shepard?" Liara yawned.

"Hey." Shepard had not expected Liara to awaken so soon, and tried strenuously to divert his attention to the asari but failed. The lingering thoughts continued to plague his mind as he gave a lack luster smile to mask the disturbance.

"Is something bothering you?" Liara pressed her forehead against his exposed neck.

"I'm alright."

"Shepard." Liara asserted.

"Honestly, I was just thinking." Shepard surrendered to her tenacity.

"About?" She persisted further.

"Us."

Liara broke away from Shepard and sat up against the head board, leaving an uncomfortable Shepard looking like patient ready to begin an uncomfortable session with the psychologist. "Thought so."

"Thought so?" Shepard locked his hands together on his core.

"I overheard you and Garrus before I walked out." Liara revealed.

"You heard that huh?" Shepard sighed. It's not that her knowledge of the conversation was concerning but rather it provided relief. This in his mind presented an opportunity to address the encumbrance that afflicted his conscience. But he wasn't going to dive into it so quickly.

Liara hesitated. "I guess we should talk about it then?"

"Liara…It was just paranoia. We don't need to address it." Shepard looked up at the blue woman.

The asari placed her hand on the folded pair resting on the man's chest. "Shepard, if we are going to spend the next hundred years together we need to be completely honest with each other."

"Okay" Shepard exhaled deeply. "First let me start by asking; when we bonded and you knew we were going to be mates, have you ever thought about my passing?"

"What? Don't be ridiculous." Liara's brow narrowed in what was a mixture of shock and disgust. "To even consider-"

"Liara please. It's inevitable that I will be gone long before your time and I need to know. Have you thought about it?" Before, it was Liara who had persisted with the question but it was now Shepard's turn.

Liara stared into the Shepard's eyes hesitantly. She had not anticipated his seriousness on the subject and was off put by the man's diligence as his eyes searched hers for an answer.

Breaking away from the unwavering stare of the man Liara pulled her knees to her chest where she found herself staring down the dark crook formed by her body. "Of course I have. But it's not like I think about it all the time. Asari relish the time they have with their mates and I plan on doing just that for next hundred years."

"And what about your last eight-hundred years?"

"What about them?"

"Do you see them with anyone else? I know in asari culture you can have multiple bond mates."

"Yes, but not all asari have multiple partners."

"Right, but there are very few who choose that lifestyle." Shepard pointed out.

"Okay. It's obvious you're uncomfortable with the idea of asari living multiple lives with multiple partners, so let me advance the conversation by asking a question of my own." Liara sounding aggravated. "Why is it such a big deal to you that I'm single when you are gone rather than worrying about whether or not you're going to remain in the military, or if you want me to continue as the shadow broker, or where we're going to live?...Or how many children we're going to have?"

"It's a big deal because I need to know that the family I leave behind is a family that belonged to me. And only me." Shepard's voice began to rise. "That's why it's a big deal Liara. It drives me crazy to know I'll be apart of a tenth of our children's life span and they're going to need somebody to care for them."

"Are you saying I won't be an adequate mother?" Liara accused.

"No I'm saying that with your line of work, they will need more. A father."

"So what you're saying is that the reason our children will be fatherless is somehow my fault? Cause if that's the case, I'm sorry that I'm going to tell them that their father disregarded their mother for out living him."

"Or you could always tell that to whatever alien you decide to cozy up to. How do you think that makes me feel Liara!"

"I don't-"

"How am I supposed to know that when I'm gone you will keep your word? How Liara!" Shepard was now uncomfortably close to Liara's face. "I'm sorry if I'm sounding selfish, Liara, but I want my children to have known one man as their father figure- Me. So can you do me the courtesy! Can you do that for me?"

Throughout their entire adventure Liara had never seen Shepard so upset with her. She tried her best to keep the situation contained but found that she was tormented by her own eruption of emotions. The passion the two had just shared moments were ago were now gone, replaced by hate -that Shepard would dare to question her faithfulness- and fear that her answers would undo the years they had spent fortifying their relationship.

"What do you want me to say Shepard!" Tears began to line the asari's sapphire eyes. "Goddess! I never thought I'd be having this conversation!"

"Liara I-"

"No, Shepard! I can't believe that you would even think that I would sit here and lie into the face of my bond mate!" Tears began to pour down her freckled cheeks.

"It's not-"

"Yes it is!" The asari had not cried as much since the fall of Thessia. It pained her that this one man- the one man she bonded her body and soul to- could cause her such pain that seemed unimaginable only a few hours ago. "I love you Shepard! You are my first, my last, my only, and for you to doubt my love is beyond insensitive!"

Liara's anguish was too much for the asari as she collapsed into Shepard's chest. Although upset with him, she couldn't help but find solace in the arms of the only lover she's ever had.

Shepard looked down his bond mate crumpling against his body. The tear soaked circle -formed beneath the weeping asari- sent chills through the man's body as the wet cloth touched his skin. Remorseful of his actions, Shepard wrapped one arm around her shoulder he placed the other hand on her head.

"Liara. Please forgive me. You're absolutely one-hundred percent correct. I was beyond insensitive and I truly apologize." Shepard stared into the abyss that was the monitor hall. "It was me being stupid…"

Liara hid her face under the jacket's hood, her breaths descended to their normal frequency with the exception of a few hiccups.

"I love you Liara T'soni. Now and forever…I don't know what's going to happen when I die, but it doesn't terrify me…Will I be somewhere else? Will I be able to see or will I just be staring into eternal darkness? Those things I do not fear, Liara." Shepard paused to check on a Liara who remained in fetal position. Seeing as it would take some time he continued. "My inadequacies to make the next hundred years of your life memorable is what I fear. I just needed-needed to know that no matter what happens in your future, you will always remember the time we had together."

Unable to bring himself to check on the asari once more, Shepard rested his head against the head board with eyes closed. "I love you Liara."

"I love you too." Liara found the strength to sit up next the man cradling her. "And I would never forget you Shepard. It's like you said of your parents; I can't."

"Thank you Liara."

Liara threw her leg over his; seating herself on Shepard's lap. Although the memory was still fresh in both their minds, Liara was determined to put it behind them as quickly as she could. If there was one way to steal a man's attention it was through sexual orientation. Although still young by asari standards, she was still an asari. And as an asari, Liara was a natural at abandoning her usual timid identity for a more seductive persona, which always seemed to surprise Shepard.

Pinching her zipper, Liara slowly pulled it down revealing the blue skin covered by the black fabric. Shepard followed the asari's hand as more of her was unveiled. Once the jacket was completely undone, the asari motioned the man's head until they met at the eyes. The asari's usual angelic spheres were replaced by two black orbs that left nothing but a small white light reflecting the stars that surrounded them.

Soon he was met by superficial pulses that rippled throughout his limbs while her hand's slithered up the man's shirt. The further she advanced; the frequented pulses were joined by a tingling sensation that coursed from head to toe. The hairs on his arms and neck stand up, heart rate increased, muscle fibers loosened, his nerves scrambled to coordinate the sudden boost of internal activity.

As Shepard gazed into the hypnotic stare the asari's jet orbs the fabricated stars seemed to intensify simultaneously against a fading room. Soon nothing in the room could be recognized amongst the gloomy atmosphere but an inky aura that traced the outskirts of his vision. However Liara's face was visible with the help of the luminescence granted to them by the holograms. With Shepard entranced, Liara was allowed to act freely. Her movements were quick yet subtle, as she was now close enough to feel Shepard's warm breath against her lips. Tilting her head slightly, she positioned herself so their lips were aligned.

But before pressing her skin against his she took one last stare into the man's eyes still enchanted by the emptiness of her own. "Take me."

"Liara." As if placed under a spell Shepard obeyed Liara's command, pulling her down to bed's surface in an affectionate embrace.

.

_"Commander, are you coming to check up on me?_

_What? No! I did not mean to insinuate…Ah, I never meant to offend you, Shepard… You must think I'm a complete and utter fool._

_Actually, I think I was talking about my interest in you. And making a fool of myself in the process._

_I wanted to know more about you…There is something compelling about you, Shepard…You intrigue me._

_With all that's happened-Saren, the geth, the Reapers-I do not if we are ready for this._

_I have never been more sure of anything in my life. Will you join with me, Shepard?_

_Shepard! Joker's still in the cockpit. He won't evacuate. I'm not leaving either._

_It's not that easy! You can't just come back, and have two years of mourning suddenly vanish…I'm sorry Shepard. I can't get into this._

_So tell me what you want. If this all ends tomorrow, what happens to us?_

_Well, I suppose I did just write your name in the stars._

_Reading, exploring, getting in trouble digging for ruins in the grass…I was very young!_

_I told those people on Thessia we'd save them!_

_It would be easy for a single ship to get lost up there, wouldn't it?_

_I love you, Shepard._

_Then show me."_

.

Those words words echoed the loudest as Shepard's mind cycled through each memory in succession. With each cycle, these memories were processed more rapidly than the last. The asari's dialogue tried to match the appropriate scenes but could not sync with the images that blurred together. The result was a dream of flashing images of the Liara accompanied by shouts and whispers that overlapped in hopes that one would be heard more distinctly than the other.

Awakened by his own mental commotion Shepard found himself in a cold sweat. The melding process had apparently reawaken memories that he had long forgotten, and although he seemed disturbed by the rush of these memories he found himself exultant having seen the journey he had shared with Liara. To witness the same conversations they shared -from the storage room in Doctor Chakwas office, to Shepard's cabin, to the very room he was in now- in perfect clarity left him feeling optimistic. To think that they had weathered adversity both emotional and physical made him believe that their relationship would provide the same excitement the next hundred years.

It was not until Shepard heard quiet footsteps of the asari approaching the bed that he noticed that he was staring up at a blank steel ceiling. The formally star-lit room was replaced by its normal lighting arrangement.

"So was the make-up sex as good for you as it was for me?" Liara stood at the foot of the bed with a periwinkle towel wrapped around her body. "I hope you don't mind that I took a shower. I know how you like to cuddle in the morning."

"Not at all." Shepard propped himself up on his elbows. "And yes it was very good. Although I feel like you might've excavated a few things in the process."

"That's because I did." Liara smiled as she walked over to her dresser.

"Wanna elaborate?" Shepard asked. "I mean, I know a lot about the whole mind and body becoming one thing but sometimes I feel like you're doing more than what you let on."

"It's nothing you have not experienced before. The way I did this time was a little different. A little more forceful." The asari explained while she pulled monotonous tops from her drawer. "It was just memory sharing. We've done it before, just this time we were not in tune to one another. Probably due to our little argument."

"Is that why my mind was flooded by old memories?" The man sat scratching his head in confusion. He tried to grasp her explanation but found that his mind had not fully recovered.

"Yes. While melding, I tried to ease your mind by tracing back to some of our…more intimate moments. Both good and bad." Liara looked at Shepard. "But like I said, we weren't exactly in sync so I was having trouble making sure your memories transitioned as clear as possible. Clear enough to show you that I was there for you when you needed me, and that you were always there when I need you."

"Ah."

"But it was mostly for me."

"How so?"

Liara continued. "Well, as I mapped your mind, I create a sort of, copy for myself. And these are the pieces of you that will live on. I'll continue to do so as long as you live."

Shepard reclined from his upright position to his original flat setting. His head still ached from the disorientating images.

"And I'll always be a part of you?" He spoke with uncertainty.

"Always." Liara assured. "Our bond-the intertwining of mind and body, the weaving of emotion and memories transcends that of time and space. We don't simply exist in this form but in everything that shapes the galaxy, Shepard. When you're gone, I will be able to feel, smell, taste and see you as you are now through the memories we share. I will be able to touch the very essence of your soul long after you're gone. And believe me; no amount of time will have any effect on how I revisit them. Whether its tomorrow or a thousand years later, you'll be here."

Shepard was overwhelmed by the words of compassion that he could not bring himself to face the asari. He couldn't forgive his earlier ignorance which resulted in their previous argument. But maybe these were the words he needed to condone his actions and to be the turning point of living the life he sacrificed greatly for.

"That's very mystical, you know that?" Shepard joked.

"I'm an asari, Shepard." Liara no longer looked at the man as she was more focused on her attire. "And besides I need to do whatever I can to hold on to you for the next nine hundred years…Goddess knows I'll miss you."

Although it was not acknowledged verbally the two agreed that it appropriate to end their discussion which prompted Liara to finally dress herself in her trademark suit. But before she could exit the room she heard Shepard's voice chase after her. Turning around gracefully, she found herself staring up at the man who had seemed to cover distance rather quickly in the few seconds she had her back to him.

"Yes Shep-" Liara was interrupted by an intense kiss from her bond mate which lasted a few seconds before he released her.

"It'll be a long time, Liara." Shepard spoke passionately.

"Shepard I really must-" The asari tried her best to stave off the man's charisma but could never truly resist his eloquence.

"I don't know where I'll be nine-hundred years from now. But wherever I end up, I'll be waiting for you." He looked at her hopefully.

"And I'll wait for you too, Shepard. I promise."

With one last kiss Shepard watched after Liara as she disappeared around the corner. Shepard was satisfied that no matter where the years took Liara, he would be there to witness it all. All eight-hundred of them.


End file.
